I don’t share quite the same sentiments as many do about mothers day, that they hate the day because they feel quilty, never able to measure up to the accolades and stories of self sacrificing mothers in talks and lessons in church.
I have felt this way before but as the years pass less so.
Mothers day is what it is. A contrived and hallmarky day that can’t possibly speak to us all.
I take my meaning from it simply that I am glad to be a mother. I love my chilluns and count myself lucky for the experience.
Have I been and am I a perfect mother? Are you kidding?
I tried. I really tried. But I was so ignorant and fallible.
This mothering thing. No one does it perfectly, in spite of the fact that todays culture has professionalized* it and made it into a performance art. It's not ladies, it's really not. It's a relationship above all else and there are as many ways to be a good mother as there are people.
Mothering, long term mothering that is, does confer a sort of wisdom to us, though. But only if we've been paying attention through the years.
Amy Tan, in The Joy Luck Club writes of listening to her mother's pearls of wisdom:
She said that if I listened to her, later I would know what she knew: where true words came from, always from up high, above everything else. And if I didn't listen to her, she said my ear would bend too easily to other people, all saying words that had no lasting meaning, because they came from the bottom of their hearts, where their own desires lived, a place where I could not belong.
The wisdom of motherhood. Oh, Mom. I miss you.
Some interesting reads, then. And no I'm not linking to Tiger mother Amy Chua. No, today should be for gentler (and more random) reading.
Measuring Mothering by Rebecca Kukla
Those mormon mommy blogs, they are addictive.
The original article that started all the chatter.
And then this. What do you think? Let's discuss.
Anna Quindlen. Her Newsweek article. She's written several good things about mommyhood. Elder Ballard even quoted her once in a general conference talk. How's that for legitimacy? he he he
*The professionalization of Motherhood. Interesting, too. See: Flown Away, Left Behind by Anna Quindlen NEWSWEEK, SATURDAY, JUNE 12, 2004
And simply because I have always loved this song, especially the last verses. It speaks to the ideal, I know, which oddly enough I cling to. It tears me up everytime.
A mother's words teach children righteous living,
And her example leads them to the light.
She speaks the words of truth, that guide their tender youth,
And point the course they take throughout their life.
A mother's life reflects itself in our life,
Her ways of living are engrained in ours.
And through the changing years, and days of joy and tears.
Her love will lead us on,
Her words will point the course,
Her hands will lift us up,
(words and music by Steven Jones)
Oh, I don't know how to format this to fit my blog space. Just go to link below if it doesn't show up. Sorry, I'm so tech lousy.